Sun, Jan. 2nd, 2005, 01:55 pm
a new moon
i cant stop thinking about you, the other night was so amazing. i am shaking just writing this. everything about that night was perfect. your touch, your smell, the expression in your eyes. it was all too perfect. i know i sound extremely stupid and kinda stalkerish but i am just expressing what i feel. i really want to see you again, and maybe you want to see me too. ooh i do hope i am not the only on feeling this. maybe you are experiencing the same emotions as i. i think we should go of somewhere. just you and i. alone together under the stars. even just imagining it makes my excited. just tell me when and where. i love you like i have never loved someone before. write back
Sat, Jan. 1st, 2005, 10:31 am
a new year
i cant belive i forgot what day it was. its a new year! and i am ready to start over my life. my life up to now has been a lie. at least in my eyes. being a kid was alright i had some good times, middle school was a bust and high school had been going awesome. well until now. i have to start over in a new town at a new school where i know nobody............at rampart (my old school) my best friends joy and sharonda would eat with all these stoner guys around the back of the school. as lame as it sounds i looked forward to lunch every day cause i was with my girls hanging out with such an intresting group of people. and now i have nothing to look forword to. no lunch with my girls, no flirting with my boys, all of that is gone, and i dont think i get that back. listen to me. all i do is whine about my pathetic little life while nobody truly gives a fuck...............why am i like this? why cant i think about any one but myself.
as i read over everything i have writen, i see how retarded this entry sounds and i am very tempted to delete it.... but i dont. i dont make any sense, and i jump around from topic to topic. but i guess this is just how i think. in that case my thinking is really messed and i need to take a nap or somthing.
....................... me= very misunderstood.......................................................
Sat, Jan. 1st, 2005, 10:18 am
i sit in the living room with the t.v on, so i dont feel alone. but i am alone. and as i sit her all by myself i can only keep my mind on one thing. or should i say one person. i cant bare to be away from him any longer. my sexual hunger grows larger every day and all i want is him. ive discovered that i dont know the things i love the most until i have them no longer. i long for him so much. hes in my mind, hes in my heart, hes in every breath, and hes in every blink of my eye. i love him like romeo loves juliet. i need him like a fish needs water. he is what i need to breath...................if only
Fri, Dec. 31st, 2004, 06:28 pm
you must stay strong in this particular time. you wouldnt want to get attached to the first person who shows you any amount of attention. you have done before many times and look where its gotten you. dont make the same mistake. trust no one. you can only trust yourself. we must stay strong and beautiful. our power is our beauty. its all we have. there will be times when you will feel lonely or unloved. the only thing you can do is wait out these misleading feelings. stay away from bible hugging white trash, and avoid all contact with men. just keep to your self and you will succeed in the end.